Never Again
You've burned me for the last time, you ill-conceived, loose translator of driving directions. Oh, I'm sure some of you folks out there have been hurt by it too-- the popular online resource for getting from here to there. You know, the one that rhymes with "CrapFest"? Sort of rhymes, but you get the picture. I almost missed a free dinner and karaoke because of you!
Since when in English does the written direction "bear slight right" actually mean "take sharp left at traffic light"??? I didn't miss anything here. I finally got wise and asked the nice young lady at the Mobil on the Run where to go and she knew exactly and when I showed her my CrapFest print-out she was puzzled. There were two streets I was supposed to turn on that aren't even there! I mean, they don't exist in our world. Maybe they do in CrapFest land, where a left is a right, a "round-a-bout" is a bridge and a stop sign is really a red barn with a drooling cow in front.
You're dead to me, CrapFest. Keep your freakish world of lies to yourself, and get a compass for goodness sake. Me, I'm going Google from now on.
Since when in English does the written direction "bear slight right" actually mean "take sharp left at traffic light"??? I didn't miss anything here. I finally got wise and asked the nice young lady at the Mobil on the Run where to go and she knew exactly and when I showed her my CrapFest print-out she was puzzled. There were two streets I was supposed to turn on that aren't even there! I mean, they don't exist in our world. Maybe they do in CrapFest land, where a left is a right, a "round-a-bout" is a bridge and a stop sign is really a red barn with a drooling cow in front.
You're dead to me, CrapFest. Keep your freakish world of lies to yourself, and get a compass for goodness sake. Me, I'm going Google from now on.
posted by Kristen @ 1:57 PM
3 Comments:
At 6:50 AM,
Anonymous said…
I have some sad news for you. Often times CrapFest, Yoohoo, and Gaggle Maps get their information from the same resources. Sure, they're free to develop their own algorithms for what to *do* with the data, but sometimes they take you on the same non-existant streets.
I just heard an interesting NPR podcast about it last night.
One of the reasons I'm considering getting a decent GPS if I take a job in Massachusetts is that when you get off the road, it updates and gives new directions to get your in the direction you're going. Well, at least the better ones do...
At 10:08 PM,
Kristen said…
I guess that figures. You reminded me that I was also thinking a while back about getting a GPS for my car. I always find myself trying to juggle these pages of directions anytime I go someplace new and it would be great to follow updated directions if I get off course. Could have used that the other night...
At 9:54 AM,
Anonymous said…
I've occasionally put in a request for driving directions for locations I know, just for the fun of it. And I can tell you I've spent many an hour trying to in some way understand their logic in the bizarre routes that have resulted. My only best guess is that they are somehow in connection with the fuel industry, as so many of their additional twists and turns add an extra fuel up or two due to excessive fuel burning...
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